I love you but I Don't want to suffer

 I love you but I don't want to suffer...

Yes you heard me, I am deeply sorry but I now belong to the group that says “Money is everything”

Funom, I have loved you since the first time I encountered you. I heard your dreams and it made sense to me, at that point I was just a 200-level student and it only made sense to date someone with dreams and a little allowance, since I was still under my parent. 

It made sense that you were struggling in a private marketing firm, your plans were big, I had imagined that as soon as I was done with the university you would have made it in life, and you will in turn help me to struggle to achieve my dreams too. Funom, was this not the plan?

The Nigerian Economy is deteriorating, and my love is also fading, and how do I pay for my next year's rent? Or make my hair next week, I can't remember the 

last time I went on a date, or the last time I ate good food, I've been using this bra for years now. 

I am not even asking for human hair, a brand new car, make-up, iPhone, and all those valid flashy things. Honestly, I'm just asking for the barest minimum and you can't even afford it. You can't afford to bring bread on your way home, can't afford to buy me flowers. 

You can't afford me anymore. 

Look at you swallowing the last Eba in this house, very soon, you will want to spread my legs and get a taste of me. Didn't you hear that broke men shouldn't be making love? You are telling me of the applications, This man is funny, applications upon applications. How many interviews have you been to? How many promises have you made? How many lies have you told? How do you expect me to sit here and support your poverty? 

The other day, I didn't have a kobo to my name, my gas has finished and I had no one to call, or are you expecting me to call my father in the village to send me two thousand nairas so I can feed on? I tried to call you but the only thing you could say is “ I wish I can do more” 

I'm beginning to think that you are probably destined to date ladies at 200 level, not a graduate like me, struggling with my 40, 000 naira secretary job. Do you want me to die living like this? 

I know what you are thinking, you are thinking I'm an entitled person, No I'm not, I've been supporting this relationship since the day you decided to leave your job to pursue scholarships and applications abroad, the Canada dream!!! Was it not my 80,000 we used to write your IELTS, was it not my 100,000 we used to apply for that school in Germany, or was it Canada? It was my blood and sweat, and what do I get in return. “ I'll make you my wife, I love you, our children will be blessed” you say things like they are achievements. 

I'm tired, are other girls better than me, are they finer? What do they have that I Don't? Why am I the one with the man with big dreams and no money, I didn't come on earth to admire people. I need my cake and I will get it. 

I love you funom, I love you, I love the way you spread my legs and praise my cooking, I love the way you smile at me and hold my hands in public, I absolutely love that you recognize my anxiety from across the room, I love your countenance and the random kiss you give me. 

I hate that Nigrian isn't favoring you, maybe I'm the problem, leave me for a change. 

Funom, don't be wicked, allow capable hands to love me.